Living with a significant other: in your 20s, 30s and 40s

Living with a significant other: in your 20s, 30s and 40s

Living with someone other than your parents can occur in childhood if you’re lucky (or unlucky) enough to share a room with a sibling or as late as moving in with your first significant other. For many, it begins in college when you move in with your first roommate – which albeit not your significant other – is the first person you’ll find yourself facing every day in the comfort of your home (or dorm room). Whether you realize it or not, it’s practice for that first time you move in with your boyfriend or girlfriend, and hopefully helps you establish a framework for how you like to live – until the day it actually happens and your framework is rocked – in a good and bad way we presume.

A few of us were reminiscing about this experience and finding humor, comfort and good advice in each other’s stories.  I think you will too.

In your 20s

The first time you live with a significant other is a major adjustment. Having lived next door to my boyfriend throughout college, I figured that moving in together would be no big deal. Not so!  What you don’t know is that you can no longer go home to clip your nails or lounge in your underwear.

The merging of households will turn into a power struggle. Whose stuff moves in and whose stuff gets taken to Goodwill? I love excessive amounts of throw pillows while my boyfriend has a beanbag chair he refuses to part with. I learned early on to pick my battles. And, the beanbag chair always wins.

Living together doesn’t equate to endless amounts of quality time. Just because you’re roommates doesn’t mean you should stop planning date nights and spend all night on your laptop.

In your 30s

In my 20s I was hyper-aware of our relationship – I would analyze everything.  In my 30s I realized “don’t sweat the small stuff” is a real thing and life is way better when you don’t overthink it. Especially when dealing with men!

Date night in my 20s means dinner, drinks and dancing. In my 30s it turned into take out, Netflix and trying to stay up past 11pm. Home sweet home, right?

After becoming a parent in my 30s, it changed the entire dynamic of living together. For starters, trying to have a conversation in your own home (while the kids are awake) becomes nearly impossible.

In your 40s

Living with your significant other in your 40s becomes way more awesome when you both recognize that getting a house cleaner will save your relationship.

In your 40s, you’re past being embarrassed about pretty much anything with your significant other. Loud noises from the bathroom fall on deaf ears, huge pimple or bad hair morning – who cares, snoring, talking in your sleep, wearing a mouth guard so you don’t grind your teeth is par for the course.

Living together can get a little boring because you become so routine that you almost feel like bosom buddies. You have to work to keep it fresh and interesting lest you become too casual!

Have your own fun stories or wisdom? Share them with us!

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